when habits invade

If we have to be completely honest, and once in a while we just have to be, many of us would agree that the element of surprise has become something of a rarity in our everyday lives. Have we any recollection of the last time someone took us by surprise or we ourselves surprised someone? What would a world without surprises be like? Personally I feel that without them, life would grind to a halt and be extremely monotonous into the bargain. This lack of surprise could be one of the reasons why so many people are depressed, stressed, extremely dissatisfied with themselves and with life itself. Changing one’s habits is probably one of the most difficult things for a human being to do – we feel comforted by the familiar and when there’s a plan underpinning what we’re doing, our life works out better that way. But when everything is carefully planned, out into a secure context and accompanied by a tight time frame, then this frame will after a while become an accepted way of doing something and before too long – a habit. These habits would stand to benefit from being broken and this takes time and effort. In return, breaking them opens your eyes to new and exciting ways of doing things.

More of the same
When you speak about an intelligent lifestyle, then this does not only mean adopting good habits, but also it is about having as few habits as possible. When something becomes a habit even the most marvelous enjoyment can be transformed into a boring humdrum experience. It also offers food for thought as, in our world of abundance, people can so often feel empty and melancholy. As human beings we are so small, there is so much of everything and in most cases we are pretty insignificant, overwhelmed by infinite changes and choices.

Even if we have a great deal, the problem is that we keep demanding more, more of the same. We live in the age of ‘more’: more choices, more fun, more fear, more uncertainty, more competition, and more opportunities. We have, all in all, become members of a society riddled with excess, an age of abundance, where everything has become an unintentional habit. We must take chances in order to change a habit- led lifestyle. Even though it is a well-known saying that ‘there are no guaranties in this life’, that is really what we are looking for in this new world of insecurity.

The average always wins
When we look at products and services, we live in an age where everyone is competing with everyone else. It is important that we can offer something different to others out there. We simply have to stop being so damned average-orientated – the mediocre never wins out. If everyone goes around doing the same thing, looking at the same things, offering the same products and services, even talking about the same things, well then we will never get anywhere.

Everyday we see new companies founded, with an even greater choice of products and even better services than their competitors. All over the world today we expect good value for money, in a market place where many suppliers offer a good product and quality service. It is no longer enough to be professional and offer good customer service, today you constantly have to surprise and sell dreams to become or stay a success. When everybody sells the same thing to the same people, then there is only one thing left and that is the story. It is about the attention you can give your product. This of course involves a risk – is it going to be a flop or a success? As the good old adage says: ‘No pain, no gain’. So break free from those habits, surprise yourself. Break out of your surroundings and you will still feel that you are alive, and that everything isn’t nearly so impossible as you once thought it was. New challenges create new energy.

Break the habit
A way to break habits is to realize that you have to build in scope for the unexpected. This is of course easier said than done, but flexibility is one of the key words in this process. If you don’t always plan everything, you will discover new things and the unexpected is transformed into pleasant, positive experiences.

I have a small to do list myself that I find helps me out when I have over-planned:

· Do not plan everything – improvise
· If you wake up at 4 o’clock, get out of bed and get on with a day that’s not straitjacketed by habits
· Try to carry out your priority list in reverse order
· Walk another way home from work
· Buy another newspaper or magazine than you would normally choose
· Choose a different colour or product
· Write a letter or a card rather than an e-mail
· Try to meet new and different people
· Do something you normally wouldn’t want to do
· Go on a different holiday

From brain owner to brain user
In my own life where the only constant is change, not over-planning has almost become a bad habit in itself. Sometimes though, this can feed stress through into my environment. I use unstructured time as training for my intuition, which helps the flow of thoughts in my work and helps me develop concepts. Here I have to trust in the natural process. It is obvious that I plan the more fundamental things in my life, but my rule is that when you have made the rules or a plan then you can always change them later on. In my work whilst trying to hone my intuition I discovered a little book by the German professor Vera Birkenbihl: “Das neue Stroh im Kopf?” (The new straw in the head). This is a little handy volume about how you can ‘use’ the brain more intelligently, creatively and spontaneously. Thereby you improve your quality of life; rather than just own a brain, where the brain cells are programmed to drive a monotonous pattern of habits. At first it is hard work, but as Birkenbihl says: “From nothing comes nothing, but from action comes everything.”

Anne Lise Kjaer
April 8, 2001